Friday, 5 August 2011

how to stop being the carer

well although my sister has support from ss to help me not have to care so much. this seems to create more work and stress than help. i am toying with the idea of getting rid of it and recruiting her another pa myself, but knowing me it will be more trouble.

the stress is so tiring on what little energy i have and ccreates more pain. we are going out today to royal armouries at leeds as i did not want to put this off. but i am feeling tired and drained at the thought of going up to yorkshire again tomorrow. it should be time to look forward to not dread. but even if i did not do anything the lack of sleep and the noise of telly booming out just drains, plus settee has no arm rests so i cannot lie down on it like i do at home so really hurts my back.

yesterday was good we went swimming agian but leo was not in the mod as he wanted his comics. but it was nice just for a short time,

macdonalds, well i cheated and went there for lunch after, saves me the haslle when i ache all over from swimming. got 2 meals and couldn't pick up so asked for a bag, which she got out, saw me struggling so opened it. when i tried to pick one up nearly knocked it over. but she did not offer to help and started to serve next customer., i was so angry/embarraseed that i was made to feel i was in the way and she wanted to get on to next customer. i finally managed to pick them up and left saying "thanks for your helpt, not that i got any!.

as i walked away from till cleaner offered to open door for me then i banged my head getting in car. realised i had forgot straws so had to go back for them. really tired by this point.

when i got home i tried to rest but realised i needed to try and russle up diinner.

well wil lstop now as tired and painful wrists but will update on afternoon fiasco.

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